Heartache

I cannot sleep. My heart hurts just too much.

Today could be one of the hardest days of my life. Ever. Or miraculously, it could be a really great day filled with good news. Either way, all I want right now is to be a little girl of five again. To be back at home on North Bonnie Brook Lane with my parents and my brother and sister and Major, our German shepherd. I want to be getting ready for my kindergarten class on this Monday morning instead of anticipating a hospital visit. I want Mom to walk me to the bus stop while I carry my little orange bath mat (for nap time) rolled up and tucked under my arm. Yes, that’s where I want to be.

I don’t want to be an adult. Not today. Maybe not tomorrow either.

Andi