Sisters ♥️

Original post: March 29, 2021, the day our dad was removed from life support. Edited.

I’ve been thinking of my sister a lot lately. My parents, my brother, and my sister moved 700 miles away from me in 1982. My father worked for IBM and was transferred…again. I was married then and expecting my first baby when the transfer came up. So I’ve not lived near my family for most of my life.

She and I were both born in May, not quite a year apart. So for twelve days we are the same age. Currently, we are both 62 until I turn 63 next week.

I’ve been listening to the Eagles for the last couple of days. The music takes me back to a place long ago when we were but carefree teenagers simply loving life. Where has the time gone?

March 28th. Our first night together has lasted about two days, so it seems. My sister made it to our hotel about 7:00 pm. It took her eleven hours to get here by car. My flight was a little late but I had arrived about 3:30. Once in my room, I cried hard for about two hours, and then fell asleep.

My sister had a picture of Dad on the dashboard of her car. She talked to, laughed at, and yelled at him for eleven hours, just as if he was in the car with her. He kept her from crying as she drove. And he got her here safely to me.

Our night was spent in conversation of various topics. Mostly about our family. Funny things our kids have said and done, and the trials she had in the final two years of Mom’s life. Dementia is cruel. There’s no other way to describe it. We laughed and we cried.

We sat in the room. We sat by the pool. And we went back to the room. Wow, it didn’t take long for the humidity to work it’s magic on my hair. (Thanks, Dad. ♥️)

We turned on TCM since my brother isn’t here. I’d start to fall asleep so we’d turn it off. As soon as it was turned off, I was wide awake again. We’d turn TV back on and talk, and I’d start to fall asleep. When it was off my mind kicked in. It wasn’t about to let me sleep.

March 29th. Finally, at 2:00 am, after several turn-offs and back-ons, she asked me, “Do you know what bananas are good for?” Well, I know they are good for many reasons but I figured she must have something new to share.

“What?”

“Bananas are supposed to help you sleep. Want one?”

“Yes, I do.”

So she and I ate bananas at 2 am, and I believe it was the best banana I’ve ever had. Did it help me sleep? Not really. Not tonight anyway. But it was the best ever. Just another special moment shared between two exhausted sisters.

Time is moving slowly. In the darkness, periodically, I hear her sob into her pillow. She tries to stifle it so as not to wake me. But I’m already wide awake. I don’t let her know though as she needs her own moments to feel everything just as I had mine earlier. We meet with hospice at 10:30 this morning. That’s what is weighing so heavily upon us tonight. This night is never ending. But the alternative is for time to go by quickly, and frankly, neither of us is ready for that. 💔

Andi