I started this blog almost four weeks ago when my dad was still with us. I’m not sure why I didn’t finish it. I’m finishing it now.
March 19, 2021
Five and a half years ago, our mother passed away. Even though my siblings and I are adults, when the three of us got into the car with dad there was a great emptiness. When was the last time the five of us were even in a vehicle together? It was many decades ago, yet what a difference one person makes.
Last night, my siblings and I sat in our hotel room together for our third and final night here in Florida. Someone was missing. Dad.
What a huge impression he’s made in my life and on my heart. He’s left one of the most powerful imprints in my life. We had a rough row to hoe all these years. I wish it would have been better.
He currently continues to fight for his life as I am on my flight home. There’s nothing more I can do here and I cannot see him. My heart hurts beyond measure.
I was unable to communicate with Dad. He was heavily sedated and could not respond to me. Was he aware of my presence? Did he hear my words, feel my touch?
Two days prior, I had a conversation with Carlos, my new friend. We both agreed that people need physical touch, skin to skin. We need to see maskless faces again. I was sharing with him my experiences in long-term health care and how difficult it is for all concerned. Many rules and mandates are controversial and contradictory. We’ve become so sterile and distant from one another that we’ve lost some of our humanness. It’s become a cold world.
That night my father was transferred to another hospital because his condition worsened greatly. I was able to see him the following day in the critical care unit. This amazing hospital allowed me to see my dad without a gown or gloves. I was able to talk closely to my dad. I rubbed his head, played with his hair, and held his hand. Skin to skin. The very thing I yearned for. The very thing so many are denied. I touched my dad.
The dynamics of one person’s life can impact your life greatly. That impression can be either good or bad. Maybe a mixture of both but hopefully, most are good in nature.
Dad was one person. Our person.
And this is tough.
April 10, 2021
It’s almost two weeks now that Dad has passed. One person, but huge part of our world. One person makes a difference. You make a difference, and so do I.
Leave the best imprint you can on the hearts of those you love, and with the many you encounter every day of your life. ♥️